


pUPA PAN'S, uHH, aDVENTURE,

by triptune



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, Mary Sue, Self Insert Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-11
Updated: 2011-08-11
Packaged: 2017-10-22 12:49:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/238175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triptune/pseuds/triptune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tavros, upon finding Mindfang's Journal (and thinking they were fantasies written out by Vriska), decides to take it upon himself to write a very touching love story starring Pupa Pan and the Subjuggulator.</p>
            </blockquote>





	pUPA PAN'S, uHH, aDVENTURE,

A/N: uHH, oKAY, sO ONE OF MY FRIENDS, aLTHOUGH I WOULD, rATHER NOT MENTION ANY NAMES, hAS BEEN, uHH, wELL, nO, nOT EXACTLY CAUGHT, bUT, hAS BEEN, sPOTTED WITH, i GUESS, aLTHOUGH IT WAS, sORT OF, aGAINST HER, i MEAN, tHEIR WILL, bUT NOT, mANIPULATED, oR ANYTHING OF THAT SORT, sINCE IT WAS REALLY, mOSTLY, aN ACCIDENT, bUT THE THINGS THEY WERE CAUGHT WITH WERE, uHH, jOURNALS OF A, fANTASY ADVENTURE, mOSTLY INVOLVING THE FLARP NAMES, oF SOME ACTUAL, nON-FICTUAL TROLLS INVOLVED, aND, mAYBE, i THOUGHT THAT, i WOULD SOMETHING LIKE THAT, tOO, sO DON'T BE, tOO HARD, iF YOU FEEL YOU NEED, tO READ THIS, aND THEN TELL ME HOW TO IMPROVE, oR, i GUESS I SHOULD SAY, dON'T BE HARDER THAN NECESSARY, aND THAT ANY HARDNESS GIVEN, mAY BE OF THE, cONSTRUCTIVE KIND, aND NOT THE, uHH, rUDE SORT,

sO, sINCE THIS IS, tHE STORY I WANT IT TO BE, iT WOULD PROBABLY BE, aLRIGHT, fOR ME TO SAY THAT I, i MEAN, tHE MAIN CHARACTER, wHO IS NOT AT ALL ME, iS PUPA PAN, wHO IS, pRETTY MUCH THE COOLEST, iN ALL OF ALTERNIA, wITH FIRES SO, uHH, sICK, tHAT EVEN DAVE IS, sEVERELY JEALOUS, aND IS PROBABLY GATHERING SOFT CLOTH FOR, tHE INEVITABLE BURNS, tHAT THEY WILL PRODUCE, aS THEY TOUCH HIS, uHH, wEIRDLY PALE SKIN,

aLTHOUGH PUPA PAN IS, nOT ANY BETTER THAN RUFIO, wHO IS ALSO ONE OF THE COOLEST TROLLS, oF ALTERNIA, aND HE IS ALSO, aN ACTUAL TROLL, aND NOT JUST A CHARACTER, bUT NOT AN ACTUAL TROLL I KNOW, jUST ONE I WRITE ABOUT, lIKE PUPA, aND I AM USING PUPA PAN, fOR THE SOLE REASON OF, uHH, pREFERENCE, aND BECAUSE, i GUESS, i ALREADY USED RUFIO FOR SOMETHING, aND THAT SOMETHING IS, nAMING MY CONFIDENCE, wHICH IS IMPORTANT,

aS I WAS SAYING, pUPA PAN WAS A, sTRONG AND CONFIDENT TROLL, wHO HAD, uHH, aLL OF THE BITCHES LINED UP, wAITING TO ASK ABOUT THE, sTATE OF HIS QUADRANTS, bUT OF WHICH, aLL WOULD BE DECLINED, bECAUSE PUPA WAS, mOSTLY ALREADY FILLED, iN THAT MATTER, wITH RUFIO AS HIS MOIRAIL, aND WENDIA, wHO WAS THE GIRL WHO WANTED TO, uHH, kISS PUPA, i GUESS, wAS HIS AND TINKERBELL'S AUSPISTICE, sINCE SHE WANTED TO BE, iN A BLACK ROMANCE WITH HIM, bUT HE WAS ALREADY KISMESIS WITH A, uHH, cERTAIN PIRATE WHO HAS A THEME OF EIGHTFOLD, wHICH ISN'T BAD, i GUESS, eXCEPT THAT IT WAS, tO THE GREAT PUPA PAN, wHO HATED HER DEARLY FOR IT,

bUT FOR THE FLUSHED QUADRANT, hE WAS NOT CURRENTLY TAKEN, aND, bY THAT, i MEAN, hE WAS INTERESTED IN A CERTAIN TROLL, aND HE WAS ALMOST SURE, tHAT CERTAIN TROLL LIKED HIM BACK, bUT IT WAS JUST, wAY TOO MUCH HASSLE TO DEAL WITH, i GUESS, tO GO FIND OUT FOR SURE, cONSIDERING, aLL IN ALL, tHAT TROLL WOULD, pROBABLY, oR DEFINITELY, rATHER, kILL HIM IF HE FOUND OUT, aND DIDN'T LIKE HIM IN RETURN, sINCE, tHAT'S WHAT THAT JOB OF TROLL DOES, oR RATHER, tHAT'S WHAT SUBJUGGLATORS DO, tHEY JUST CULL THINGS, aND SOMETIMES DO PARTICULARLY FRIGHTENING THINGS, wITH THE BLOOD OF THOSE THEY'VE CULLED,

pUPA WAS A TROLL OF ADVENTURE, tHOUGH, aND THE FEAR OF BEING, bRUTALLY SLAUGHTERED, bY THE ONE HE WAS FLUSHED FOR, wAS NOT FEARFUL TO HIM IN THE LEAST, oR IT WAS, bUT ONLY BECAUSE THAT MEANT REJECTION, wHICH NO TROLL IS REALLY FOND OF, aND SO HE THOUGHT OF, dIFFERENT WAYS HE COULD ASK THIS SUBJUGGLATOR, wHO IS NOT MODELED AFTER ANY REAL TROLL NOT INVOLVED IN THIS STORY, wHATSOEVER, tO BE HIS MATESPRIT,

iT WOULD BE A DIFFICULT TASK, tO ASK THE SUBJUGGLATOR, tHAT IS, bUT PUPA WAS READY FOR IT, nOT EVEN HESITATING BEFORE HE, sTARTED OFF IN FLIGHT TOWARD THE SUBJUGGLATOR'S HIVE,

i GUESS HERE IS WHERE I SHOULD MAKE IT CLEAR, tHAT PUPA PAN ISN'T LOOKING FOR A DEATH WISH, oR SOMETHING EQUALLY MORBID, bUT ACTUALLY LIKES THE TROLL, tHAT THE SUBJUGGLATOR WAS, bEFORE HE WAS A SUBJUGGLATOR, iF THAT, uHH, mAKES SENSE, aND SO HE IS TAKING A CHANCE, tO SEE IF, mAYBE THERE IS A WAY TO, bE WITH THE SUBJUGGLATOR, wITHOUT THE SUBJUGGLATOR IN QUESTION SUBJUGGLATING HIM, lIKE SUBJUGGLATORS DO, wHICH WOULD BE BAD,

wOW, i SHOULD, sTOP WRITING SUBJUGGLATOR,

aCTUALLY, sINCE THIS IS MY STORY, i COULD JUST SAY THAT, tHERE WAS NO QUESTION THAT THE MIGHTY CULLER, wHO IS ONLY SLIGHTLY LESS MIGHTY THAN THE EMPRESS, wOULD NOT CULL PUPA PAN, bECAUSE PUPA IS, uHH, sTRONG ENOUGH TO WITHSTAND ANY BLOWS, tHAT THE SUBJUGGLATOR MIGHT BLOW, aND HE IS STRONG ENOUGH, aND CONFIDENT ENOUGH, tO FIGHT BACK, iF HE REALLY NEEDS TO, wHICH HE WON'T, sINCE, aS THIS IS STILL MY STORY, i CAN JUST WRITE THAT THE SUBJUGGLATOR FEELS PITY, fOR PUPA PAN, aS WELL, aND SOLVE ALL OF THE POSSIBLY GROTESQUE CONFLICT, tHIS STORY MIGHT HAVE CAUSED,

pUPA PAN WOULD SAY, SOMETHING LIKE "oH, gREAT HIGHBLOOD, i, uHH, pITY YOU, dO YOU FEEL, aNY SORT OF SIMILAR EMOTION FOR ME," eXCEPT LESS DESERPATE, sINCE PUPA PAN WAS, pRETTY GREAT, tOO, wiTH HIS CONFIDENCE AND, aBILITY TO FLY,

tHE SUBJUGGLATOR WOULD BE, pLEASED TO HEAR THIS, aND BE SAYING SOMETHING LIKE "oH tAvBrO,

nO, wAIT,

,,,,,,

i CAN DELETE THAT, rIGHT,

tHE SUBJUGGLATOR, wHO WOULD BE SPEAKING TO PUPA PAN, aND NOT ME, wHO IS THE AUTHOR, aND NOT A CHARACTER IN THIS STORY, aS I HAVE STATED EARLIER, wOULD BE PLEASED TO HEAR THAT STATEMENT, tHAT PUPA HAD JUST SAID, aND HE WOULD PROBABLY, aCTUALLY REPLY WITH, sOMETHING LIKE "you are INTERESTED IN A MOTHERFUCKER like me", mAYBE, eXCEPT HE WAS SO HAPPY, tHAT THIS EVENT HAPPENED, tHAT HIS QUIRK TURNED BACK TO WHO HE ORIGINALLY WAS, aND HE WENT BACK TO, tHE OLD QUIRK HE POSSESSED WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER, sO IT WAS MOSTLY LIKE, wHAT I TYPED EARLIER, eXCEPT, mY NAME WOULDN'T BE IN IT, oBVIOUSLY, aS I AM STILL NOT A CHARACTER, aND I WOULD NEVER, uHH, bE INTERETESTED IN THE CHARACTER, tHE SUBJUGGLATOR, rEPRESENTS, wHO IS MY FRIEND, rEALLY,

,,

sO, tHEN THE SUBJUGGLATOR, wHO ABANDONS HIS ROLE IN SOCIETY, aND HIS CULLING, aND ALSO BASICALLY EVERYTHING THAT WOULD, bE OFFENSIVE, oR BAD, oR GENERALLY UNPLEASANT IN NATURE, sO HE COULD RETURN TO THE TROLL HE WAS, aND BE WITH PUPA PAN,

aS THEY WERE ALL ADULT TROLLS, tHEY, uHH, cOUPLED TOGETHER, aS ADULT TROLLS TEND TO DO WITH THEIR MATESPRITS, aND I GUESS THAT CERTAIN THINGS, oF A, sEXUAL NATURE, wERE FILLED, fOR THE IMPERIAL DRONE, wHICH WAS GOOD, bECAUSE THAT MEANT PUPA WOULD NOT BE CULLED BY THAT, eITHER,

pUPA PAN TURNED OUT TO BE, qUITE ASTOUNDING, aT THIS TASK, fILLING MORE THAN HIS FAIR SHARE OF, wHAT THE IMPERIAL DRONE WAS COLLECTING, aND THAT, i GUESS, i MEAN, bUCKETS, sINCE THAT IS, hEALTHY, aND NOT AT ALL GROSS, fOR AN ADULT TROLL TO SHOW INTEREST IN, sINCE SHOWING NO INTEREST, aLSO MEANS THEIR PROBABLE DEATH,

sO, pUPA, wHO WAS NOT AT ALL GROSSED OUT, aND, hAD EXTRAORDINARY PERFORMANCE, aLTHOUGH, tHE SUBJUGGLATOR WAS NOT, bAD, aND HE WAS GREAT, tOO, aND THEY BOTH WERE JUST, fILLING, a LOT, aND THEY JUST, oVERDID IT SO MUCH THAT, yOU COULD SAY THEY, uHH, fILLED ALL OF THE, bUCKETS, rATHER THAN JUST A, lARGE AMOUNT, tHAT WAS SOMEWHAT UNNECESSARY, cONSIDERING THE IMPERIAL DRONE, aND THE AMOUNT THAT THEY TAKE, wHEN THEY SHOW UP TO COLLECT THE, uHH, gENETIC MATERIAL,

aND, wOW, iT IS STILL KIND OF WEIRD TO WRITE ABOUT THAT, eVEN UNDER THE CONTEXT THAT, iT IS NOT WEIRD AT ALL, aND THAT IT IS NORMAL, bECAUSE IT IS NORMAL, fOR ADULT TROLLS, tHAT IS, eSPECIALLY PUPA PAN, aND THE SUBJUGGLATOR, wHO ARE CHARACTERS IN THIS STORY, aND ALSO REAL TROLLS, bUT ARE NOT REPRESENTATIONS OF ANY TROLL, bESIDES THEMSELVES, bECAUSE THAT WOULD BE, wEIRD,

i MEAN, iF THE TROLL, nOT QUITE REPRESENTED BY, tHE SUBJUGGLATOR, hAS FEELINGS FOR THE TROLL, nOT QUITE REPRESENTED BY PUPA PAN, tHEN IT WOULDN'T BE WEIRD, i GUESS, bUT THAT IS NOT WHAT IS HAPPENING, i THINK, sO THAT IS NOT, a THING, TO WORRY ABOUT, bUT IN CASE A CERTAIN, uHH, hIGHBLOOD HAS, fEELINGS, i WOULD LIKE TO, nOT DISSUADE THEM, sINCE, iT'S ONLY WEIRD FOR ME TO, wRITE ABOUT IT IN MY STORY, lIKE I AM DOING NOW,

bUT INSTEAD OF, wRITING ABOUT THAT, lET ME TELL YOU, hOW THE GREAT PUPA PAN, aND THE SUBJUGGLATOR, wERE A PERFECT FLUSHED PAIR, aND HOW THEY WERE PRETTY INSEPARABLE, iN THEIR PITY, eXCEPT WHEN EITHER OF THEM WANTED SPACE, bECAUSE THEY UNDERSTOOD EACH OTHER, bUT NOT LIKE MOIRAILS DO, bUT LIKE THE BEST MATESPRITS DO,

wHICH IS STILL, kIND OF, uNDERSTANDING, i GUESS,

aND WHEN PUPA PAN'S KISMESIS, wHO IS STILL THAT POWERFUL, mANIPULATIVE PIRATE TROLL, wHO I AM NOT TOO FOND OF MENTIONING, dUE TO, uHH, mISCELLANEOUS REASONS, aND NOT BECAUSE OF, fEAR, oR ANYTHING LIKE THAT, bECAUSE THAT WOULD BE SILLY, sINCE THIS IS JUST A STORY, aND NO REAL TROLLS ARE, aCTUALLY BEING MENTIONED, bESIDES FOR THE ONES, lITERALLY MENTIONED, lIKE PUPA PAN,

bUT WHEN SHE DOES SOMETHING CRUEL, wHICH SHE TENDS TO DO, a LOT, aND SOMEHOW MANAGES TO HURT HIM WITH HER LUCK, DESPITE THEM BEING OF, sIMILAR STRENGTH, wHICH MAKES THEM PERFECT TO BE EACH OTHER'S KISMESIS, uHH, soMETIMES gAMZ

i MEAN,

sOMETIMES THE SUBJUGGLATOR, wHO IS, aGAIN, nOT A REAL TROLL, aND IS JUST A CHARACTER, iN THIS STORY, dECIDES TO GET REVENGE, iN A NON-CULLING WAY, aND IT IS ACTUALLY VERY CARING, i GUESS, aND IT MAKES PUPA, pITY HIM MORE, bECAUSE IT SHOWS SOME OF THAT HUMAN EMOTION EQUIVALENT OF PITY, wITHOUT ACTUALLY BEING, rEALLY STUPID, oR REALLY CULLWORTHY, iF THAT MAKES SENSE, sINCE THOSE TRAITS THAT HUMANS, rEALLY TEND TO BE,

aND SO, tHEY LIVED, pRETTY HAPPILY EVER AFTER, wITH PUPA STILL REMAINING TO ALWAYS BE ABLE TO FLY, aND WALK, aND THE GREAT SUBJUGGLATOR STILL, dOING THINGS THAT HE DOES, bESIDES CULLING, lIKE ENJOYING SOPOR PIES, tHAT ARE SLIGHTLY MAGICAL, iN THAT, tHESE ONES DO NOT ROT YOUR THINKPAN, bUT JUST GIVE YOU MIRACLES, wHICH MEANS THERE IS BASICALLY, nO CONSEQUENCE, tO EATING THE PIES CONSTANTLY, lIKE THE SUBJUGGLATOR DOES,

oH, aND, pUPA PAN'S FRIEND, uHH, aRIANA JONES, wHO I DON'T THINK IS A REAL TROLL, bECAUSE I JUST MADE THAT NAME UP, bUT IS ONCE AGAIN, nOT REALLY, sORT OF, mOSTLY NOT, bASED OFF OF AN ACTUAL LIVING TROLL, aLTHOUGH MAYBE NOT LIVING, bUT THAT IS KIND OF HARD, tO EXPLAIN, rEMAINS A HAPPY, aND LIVING TROLL, iN THIS STORY, aND SHE VISITS QUITE OFTEN, tO FLARP WITH PUPA PAN, aND NEITHER OF THEM GETS INJURED, lIKE EVER,

i THINK THIS IS WHERE I WRITE THE END, sINCE I'M KIND OF, rUNNING OUT OF FANTASIES, tO WRITE HERE, aND I AM BEGINNING TO FEEL AS IF, i SHOULD START MAKING THESE THINGS REAL, rATHER THAN THE FAKEY FAKE STORIES, tHAT THEY ARE NOW,

sO,

tHE END,

A/N: wISH ME LUCK, oR GIVE ME SOME, iF YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO GIVE LUCK, rATHER THAN TAKE IT, fORCIBLY, bECAUSE I AM GOING, tO GO MAKE SOME OF THIS STORY, nOW A TRUE STORY, bUT NOT THE PART ABOUT THE FLYING, bECAUSE I DON'T THINK THAT'S REAL,

(aND, uHH, gAMZEE, iF YOU SEE THIS, rATHER THAN ASKING ABOUT HOW YOU FOUND MY JOURNAL, i WILL ONLY ASK, tHAT YOU WAIT FOR A MOMENT, bECAUSE I AM COMING OVER, sOON, tO TALK ABOUT SOMETHING WITH YOU,}:) sEE YOU SOON,)


End file.
